Tag Archive | dating

SHAME ON YOU..Media and Judicial System

It amazes me that just because now a magazine wants to get in on the action, Bill Cosby is guilty.  This is a smear campaign.  Let’s look at the scenario from the beginning.  A comedian who wanted to get in good with some….folks, accused Bill Cosby of sexual assault and rape- That flourished the internet.  The Media, then stated that Bill Cosby secretly drugged the ladies.  The transcripts came out and it states that : Did you know you were taking a Quaalude? answer: Yes.  So since it wasn’t a secret to the women, the media changed its angle.  Saying that he drugged the women.  Something Bill Cosby stated himself. Now, they are opening sealed documents from over 10 years ago. Now call me crazy, sealed has a definition of its own.

My country tis of thee, sweet land of liberty of thee I sing… America has a judicial system that is not for African Americans.  I have watched numerous beatings and unethical practices done by police officers, and police officers get off.  I’ve watched people destroy O.J. Simpson things when they didn’t like the verdict.  I’ve sat on a trial listening to a transplant from Texas say, “I’m not going to let that guy get off because he can sue the cops.”  Now, I’m a very open-minded person, and do not like to prejudge.  But society is showing its true colors by pursuing this.  When someone says the LGBT society is just like the treatment of blacks…this is when once again it differs.  This is when the treatment goes to the extreme.  I’m not in favor of sexual assault, or abuse, but all of the women have something in common.  They wanted private time with Mr. Cosby; they all knew he was married; they wanted a favor; they had an ulterior motive; no one is speaking about that.  Because when perhaps Paris H; L. Lohan, or someone else got high and had sex it seemed to be okay.  Now, 10-20 or more years later, the media will pursue and attack the black man Bill Cosby; smear his credentials….open sealed documents….SHAME ON YOU MEDIA SHAME ON YOU JUDICIAL SYSTEM. SHAME ON YOU.

THIS IS JUST A SIMPLY PROVOCATIVE THOUGHT…WHAT ARE YOUR THOUGHTS

Trust vs. Love Is one more important than the other?

Many people have been betrayed by someone they love.  But how do you move on with that person?  When it’s your mother, do you erase the act and start all over again because she’s your mom?  When it’s your brother or sister, do you erase the act because he/she is family?  When it’s a relative, does that person get the same regard as a parent or sibling?  You love them  because they are your family versus because you have established a real relationship of some sort with the person.

And let’s talk about friends, I guess by today’s standards.  How many foul plays are accepted before you walk away? Or do you have categories, like the friend you go shopping with, or the movies, but a different one for going out, another for couple events?  Do you trust them only within their category? Or do you wholeheartedly trust them; and if they go beyond the barriers they are out for the category or just out? Or are you just a good friend and love them for who they are and want the best for them? (is this an antiquated way of thinking by today’s standards?

Is one more important than the other?  Last thought, when you’re married, do you trust that your spouse is going to take care of you if you should get sick?  Does that other person puts the uncomfortable moments aside and does everything to comfort you? Or does he/she act in the most complaining way; minimalistic-does  what has to be done, and disregard the new things that need attention;the compromising of the self for the sick?  I don’t know. Just pondering if one is more important than the other.

Personally, I think….well you tell me what you think.

Wishing you well…Or not!

Do you want to go out?  What are you up to?  Why don’t you come over?  Do you have a minute…I need to talk.  Let’s go shopping.  Have you seen …?  These are the questions your single friends will ask at any time of the day or night…that’s until you move in with your guy.  The phone calls stop.  They don’t even check on you to see how things are going…I take that back…to see if things are going badly.  Once things turn out to work out and you’re happy…you can turn your phone in and actually get a pre-paid phone because you are not using minutes with no one other than family members and other people who are in relationships.

He says:  Why don’t your girlfriends call anymore?  What happened?

She says: I don’t know.  I thought they were happy for me.

She doesn’t know how to feel about this. She reflects and re-evaluates how she’s treated them.  She recalls always supportive when they were in relationships.  She’s helped them with their problems.  She gave them a shoulder to lean on and if they ever needed it…a few bucks for whatever.

Many women find it difficult to wish other women happiness.  Why is that?  They can do it when they are part of a sorority.  Or is that forced too…because you’re supposed to be supportive.  What is it about?  Women can be the most nurturing and giving human being; but when it comes to a friend having a relationship and the friend empty handed.zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz  the friendship sleeps.  It becomes dormant.  Were they ever friends?  Do you invite them to the wedding?  I mean, you’ve never had an argument to end the relationship…it just dissolved within the debauched friendship.

What do you do?  Do you call and make them respond to their insecurities? Do you just wish them well? Because really, that’s the type of person you are.  Do you care? What do you do?

Stay in your lane….babe

“Babe you look good.” “ You look sexy in those heels.” “That smile of yours warms me.” “Damn, you look good in that dress!” “And that ass…..mmmmmm.” “ I’m so proud to have you on my arm.” “ I can’t wait till we get home!” “You are the most beautiful woman I know. I’m blessed.”

All of these things are wonderful. However, there is the moment when he says while looking at another woman, “Why don’t you wear your hair like that?”  “That would look good on you.”  “Why don’t you do something else with your hair?”  “Have you ever tried eye lashes?”  “Why don’t you let your nails grow?”

The look of “Why don’t you do something different with your hair? Your belly?  Why don’t you change your hair cut?  Let me update your closet.”  How about this, “let’s do something different in the bedroom.”  “Let’s invite an extra guy over.”  Well, after making the mistake of saying one of the above, I responded and he was not pleased.

STAY IN YOUR LANE!  I love you the way you are…Love me for who I am.

I’m not opposed to spicing things up in the bedroom; or trying new styles in my wardrobe.  But consider where I work; what I do and if it’s appropriate.

There will always be someone more attractive, eye catching for either one of you. And when we have date night, let us do our best to impress each other.  Otherwise, Stay in Your Lane; because I’ve got this.

When saying goodbye is hard to do…

When saying goodbye is hard to do…
So you’ve been in the long term relationship that you thought in the beginning would last a lifetime. You both are opposites; and you see how each person balances the other. However, there has never been any verbal exclusivity. It worked because both parties like the sense of togetherness and separateness at his and her own convenience. Six years down the road, you find yourself wanting a real commitment. What do you do? How do you change the pattern to help the other party understand you are serious?
You start off with the conversation that explains the needs and wants. When he or she reacts opposing, do you stay because there is love there, or do you leave? Do you give the person time to think about what is wanted? If so, how long do you wait? What’s at stake? Is it an all or nothing deal?
Depending on the age, the tolerance will vary. I believe women will put up with the male as long as she can;, however, there will be a breaking point. A point of no return. Is that worth it? Is it not better to leave when you’ve expressed your needs and desires that are not being met? This way at least there’s a possible friendship. Or do you hold out with the hope of him wanting and acting upon the same.
After 45, it’s very difficult to date as a woman. Many have already had families, divorced or with children. And men tend to look for women with body types liking a 30 year old. So that leaves women from 45-50 with young men who don’t seem to be afraid to approach them and hit on them; and can probably yank a hair or two; but no conversation; or the retirees who have different needs and activities because you’re still working. So, what do you do? Do you say goodbye for the unknown? Or do you keep the predictable complacent relationship that warrants half ass happiness?
When do you say goodbye?

Are you following me?

With mayoral elections and other elections coming down the pike, the promise of  honor and loyalty remains to be a consistent song amongst runners and the incumbent.  However, there should be a diary.  A diary of all of the conversations and events that the runners and incumbent experience.  It’s very hard to trust anyone.  Not one official has proven to be 100% because not one official has 100% real power.  So, with modern technology, why is there not a diary, electronic diary, incorporating synopsis of details alongside an instagram or tweet?  This would at least assist the politician in doing the right thing for the masses versus self.

On another note, significant job holders such as superintendents and state appointed employees when taking over school districts should be doing the same thing.  If the objective is to be honest, good, and progressive as a community and society, then what’s there to hide?  A tiny provocative thought.